Lao Xian has once again made an important contribution to the world's intangible cultural heritage, and has a shocking new interpretation of the word "gun".
"Cultural differences, cultural differences."
The old fairy's voice was lonely, and he patted the tour guide who looked confused with his hand, and then got back into the car.
Guangming, Han Dayan, Nanmanzi, Zhiwei, these elderly people do not like to move, and besides, they still have cash and gold bars at home to look after, so they did not go with us.
So, it was just me, Lao Xian, Jin Beibei, Zhang Ben, Li Hao, and the tour guide who went out for a walk. We drove two pickup trucks, enjoyed the beautiful scenery, and embarked on the road to play.
We first arrived at Mongla, which already has a city atmosphere, and most supplies can be purchased as long as the requirements are not excessive.
After buying some daily necessities, we went to worship Buddha because there are many Buddha statues here.
"Fuck, it's weird to pray to Buddha as soon as you go out. It's not interesting at all." The old immortal was obviously still thinking about having sex. He hadn't done that for a long time, and he was a bit depressed.
"Hey, Benzi, you did a good job. You didn't die even after being shot twice, haha." Jin Beibei said with a smile as he put his arms around Zhang Ben's neck.
What he meant was, buddy, you are very lucky, but it would be nice to come back. I am very happy, but he is a careless person. What was originally a nice greeting turned out to taste bad in his mouth.
Zhang Ben frowned, stretched out his hand to pull Beibei's arm away, and then said: "You're not fucking dead, how can I die?"
"What's going on? Why don't I kid you? Why are you so petty?" Jin Beibei said with a shrug.
If we use modern language, these two people are born to be enemies. Once they meet, they live to fight each other. When things happen, they don't even notice it, and they start fighting each other whenever they are free.
"Are you kidding me about whether someone is dead or not? Gungun, don't talk to me." Zhang Ben reached out and pushed Jin Beibei.
"Oh shit, push me one more time." Jin Beibei blinked her ignorant eyes, holding a lollipop in her mouth, and she looked at this person who didn't have all the eyesight.
"It's over or not. Everyone is having fun when they come out to play. Don't fucking bullshit me." I turned around and cursed.
"I'm too lazy to pay attention to you, you silly B." Zhang Ben cursed in a low voice and took a few steps forward.
"Hey, brother Xian, tell me, is he careless? What did I say? Just make fun of me." Jin Beibei told the old fairy his grievances.
"...You two are naturally at odds with each other, so don't get together if you have nothing to do." Lao Xian replied absentmindedly.
"Brother, why is your crotch so hard all the time?" Jin Beibei lowered her head and said in confusion.
"Fuck, I have no place to use my energy. I want to shoot. This stupid tour guide really found a gun for me. I really have nothing to say." The old immortal looked a little melancholy.
"Well, I'm so depressed too," Jin Beibei said in a low voice.
"Hey, let them wander, and we can find a place to play." The old immortal said with a wink.
"Okay, it just so happens that I'm also fucking annoying Zhang Ben." Jin Beibei nodded in agreement without hesitation.
"Wait a moment, and I'll ask the tour guide again."
After the old immortal finished speaking, he quickly caught up with us, grabbed the tour guide, and bared his teeth and said, "Hey, buddy."
"If you have something to say," the tour guide looked at Lao Xian and replied.
"...Is there a brothel?" Lao Xian asked very bluntly this time.
"What brothel."
"It's the kiln.ziguan."
"What is a kiln?"
"Fuck,."
The old immortal was so anxious that his head was covered with sweat. He thought for a moment, thrust forward twice with his waist, pointed at his crotch and said: "Fuck a girl for money, OK, make a little man, do you understand, it's just you." Do you understand what you and your wife do every night?"
"oh,."
The tour guide showed a look of realization again.
When the old immortal saw his expression, he felt quite unsure of himself. He was afraid that he would unleash another cannon, so he asked cautiously: "You really understand."
"Just say you want to fuck...that's all." The tour guide replied speechlessly.
The old immortal was stunned for three seconds, gave a thumbs up and said: "You dare to say it more than me."
"Yes, but at this time, they are all cheap and of poor quality." The tour guide said truthfully.
"It's okay, as long as she is a woman." Lao Xian waved his hand and said.
"Okay, then I'll take you there." The tour guide agreed.
"Thank you, thank you."
The old immortal immediately clasped his fists repeatedly.
…
Then the tour guide said hello to us, took Lao Xian and Jin Beibei, drove a car and left, while Zhang Ben, Li Hao and I continued to wander around the streets, worshiping Buddha, and buying some specialties and arts. It's pretty good to enjoy the food and stuff.
Lao Xian and the others drove for more than 20 minutes and arrived in front of a foot massage parlor that was completely imitated in China. Then the tour guide took them out of the car, and Lao Xian and Jin Beibei walked in.
Entering the house, there was a slovenly middle-aged man and two seven or eight-year-old children. The tour guide chatted with him for a few words, and the middle-aged man called out four or five girls with heavy makeup. Yes, they are girls. , completely irrelevant to girls.
"One hundred yuan a time, you can't do it."
The tour guide turned around and asked.
"You're...a little older, right?" Jin Beibei asked a little unhappily.
"I already told you that the quality is not good. There are no girls here. If you want good quality, you have to wait until later." The tour guide whispered.
"...Hey, handsome boy, you're not here to play here just to find a wife, that's all." One of the ladies said with a smile.
"Chinese." The old immortal was stunned for a moment and asked.
"Well, my family is from Guangxi." The girl replied.
"Are there any from the Northeast?" Jin Beibei scanned around and asked.
"No." The girl replied.
"Okay, okay, it's up to you." The old immortal wanted to leave, but after thinking about it, he felt that we definitely couldn't wait until night before leaving. If we don't do it now, maybe we can do it later.
"Brother, I'm too damn old, I really can't do anything." Jin Beibei said in a low voice.
"Fuck, this is the original demand. Let's make do. You are in a foreign country. What kind of bicycle do you want? I will choose one for you, and it will be her." Lao Xian pointed at a person wearing a pink skirt and said.
"...No, just do it, I really can't get hard." Jin Beibei gritted her teeth and replied.
"You go ahead, do it, it's boring for me to do it myself."
"Brother, there is really no room for compromise in this game. I will leave a shadow after I do it. Come on." Jin Beibei resolutely refused.
"You look like a loser, forget it, I'll do it myself."
The old immortal replied disdainfully, and then stopped trying to persuade him. He paid a hundred yuan and was ready to go into the house to solve the problem. But when he got inside, he suddenly frowned. The long, narrow and damp corridor was filled with the smell of The smell was disgusting, and there were many cages stacked in the aisles with grunting native dogs inside.
Entering the room inside, Lao Xian almost stumbled over from the musty smell. He touched a handful of bedding and felt like water could be squeezed out of them. Although Lao Xian didn't care much about women, as long as they had eyes, he didn't care about this. The environment is really unacceptable.
"Take it off."
That girl took off her clothes when she entered the house.
"Hey, wait a minute, can you guys come up with something?" Lao Xian said standing at the door.
"No." The woman shook her head.
"Forget it, I can't stand this place." Old Xian gritted his teeth and replied, with a look of reluctance on his face, and turned around to leave.
"...Hey, handsome boy, how much money can you give me for the introduction, and where will it be done?" The woman thought for a moment and asked.
"Five hundred, in the car, okay?" the old immortal gave the price.
"Then I'll ask the boss."
"OK."
Twenty minutes later.
Lao Xian drove this old lady in a car, with the tour guide and Jin Beibei behind him, and started looking for woods everywhere.
"Hey, how old are you, sister?"
The old immortal asked casually.
"Those born in the year of Ox." The old ladies returned casually.
"Oh shit, what a coincidence, I am also born in the year of the Ox. I was born in 1985. I am twenty-two this year, so you should be thirty-four, one step older than me..." The old immortal said with good arithmetic.
"Haha..." The old ladies smiled in a charming way.
Lao Xian looked at her and smiled, feeling something was wrong, and then asked tentatively: "Aren't you the same guy in 1961? I'm, damn, forty-six years old."
"Well, I'm so proud of you."
"..." Lao Xian drove the car, his face turned green.
"Hey, Brother Xian, how old is your grandma this year?" Jin Beibei asked wickedly.
"Get out of here, don't fuck!"
…
The other end.
Yuzhai.
Guangming and Han Dayan were having nothing to do, walking around with some native dogs.
"This place is really nice, suitable for people like us." Han Dayan said while squatting on the ground and smoking a cigarette.
"Nowhere is worse than home," Guangming said helplessly.
"Haha, where is your hometown?"
"Suihua." Guangming replied casually.
Two middle-aged people started chatting sentence by sentence. It was a different kind of happiness to be able to hear one's own mother tongue in a foreign country. The two were of the same age, so the relationship warmed up quickly.
In an attic somewhere in Yuzhai, Cha Meng and a companion were lying on the window, squinting and looking at the two people in the distance.
"Meng, I think they are just looking at the cash and gold. We have no chance to do anything." The companion said, licking his lips.
"I didn't see clearly that day, how much gold do you think they had?" Cha Meng turned around and asked.
"How many kilograms? I haven't tried it yet, so I really don't know how much it is." The companion shook his head.
"...I'm so greedy." Cha Meng said while rubbing his palms.
"If you take it down, our situation will be much better. Our team is short of guns and men." His companion quickly replied.
"Don't worry, everyone is here with us. You can eat it at any time. We will ship goods to Guangzhou in a few days. Depending on General Kun Li's wishes, the goods should be delivered by these people. If they deliver them, they must take them with them. We'll talk about it then..." Cha Meng was silent for a long time and took a deep puff of cigarette.
PS: I stayed up until 7:36 and finally finished writing it. I can send it out before 8 o'clock. It's the beginning of the month. Everyone who has a monthly pass in their hands will give their full support.