The reason why our lives are cruel is not that the past will never come back, but that the past will forever turn into dust. Human life is so fragile, and once lost, there will be no trace of it, as if it were lost.
It's as if this person has never been in this world, as if everything he has ever experienced is just a dream.
After finishing the meal, Zhuang Qing said to me with a smile: "I'll go wash the dishes. I'm the master here."
I smiled and said: "You are not feeling well today. Let me go."
She smiled brightly at me and said, "Feng Xiao, you are so kind."
I packed up the dishes and went to the kitchen. At this moment, I clearly knew that the distance between us would always exist. You know, if it were in the past, we would never speak politely like this. And there is
, she truly regarded me as her guest deep in her heart.
After I finished cleaning her kitchen, I found that she was already sitting on the sofa and the TV was turned on. She said to me: "Feng Xiao, go to the bedroom and bring the quilt."
I didn't know why, but I went anyway.
I walked up to her with the quilt in my arms, and she smiled and said to me, "Come, sit next to me, and let's watch TV together under the quilt."
I immediately felt very interesting and warm, so I went to sit next to her, and then wrapped the quilt around us, leaving only our heads exposed.
She came into my arms and leaned against me like that, "Well. This is so comfortable. Feng Xiao, your meat sofa is very nice."
I laughed immediately, and at the same time, I once again felt an extreme warmth. Her delicate body was in my arms, and we were like a pair of lovers at this moment... No, maybe more like
They are a couple.
A classical drama was playing on the TV, and I was surprised to find that the heroine in it was Xu Ruhui.
"She is very beautiful, right?" Zhuang Qing asked me.
I nodded, "She looks beautiful in ancient costume. Much more beautiful than she is in reality."
She smiled and said: "She has that melancholic temperament. I can't do that. I'll look ugly in ancient costume."
I smiled and said, "I've never seen you look like you in ancient costumes. But you look good in military uniform."
She smiled and said: "As long as a woman is not ugly, she will look good in military uniform."
I asked her in surprise: "Really? What does this mean?"
She smiled and said: "What you men actually like is women with character. Right? Military uniforms can make women show a different temperament. This is actually a kind of uniform temptation. Right?"
I didn't agree with her explanation, but I still nodded in agreement with her statement. I didn't want the atmosphere between us to be unpleasant in the slightest.
I really like this kind of atmosphere, because it is very warm, and the warmth makes me intoxicated. Suddenly, an idea came to my mind, "Zhuang Qing, can I move to your place for a few days? I
I want to be able to spend more time with you during my time in Beijing. Especially in the past few days, I want to take good care of you."
She was startled for a moment and then shook her head, "Feng Xiao, I don't want the paparazzi to know about us. I don't care, because as actors, we need the effect of exposure. But what about you? You are an official
Feng Xiao, this matter is so important to you. You must not be in love with your children. You must know that your career is more important than anything else now. It is very simple to say that in this life, just do it.
Just do the things you want to do, and that's enough."
I said gloomily: "Although your words make sense, I think they are completely different things. Work is work, and life is life. We can't spend all our lives working 24 hours a day.
Bar?"
She smiled and said, "Didn't you tell me before? Nothing in a person's life can be perfect. Only flaws are the real perfection. You also said that the world is fair and you can only gain by losing. How can you
Have you forgotten what you said?"
I suddenly asked her in astonishment: "Did I say such a thing?"
She kept laughing, "You, when you reason with others, you do one thing and another, but it's different when it's your turn? I am actually very content. For example, now, I am very content.
.Think about it, there are so many people who have drifted to the north, how many of them can reach this stage that I am now? I feel that I am enough, and I am very satisfied."
I didn't expect that she would say this, because I didn't believe in my heart that she would really be satisfied. But when I suddenly remembered her previous words, I suddenly seemed to understand: If she really wanted to avenge Song Mei
If things are put first, then it is completely understandable that she is so contented. Because now she has reached a certain value.
This is indeed the case. Now if she wants to get money or anything else, including having a family, it is not a difficult thing, as long as she is willing.
But I still tried to dissuade her, "Zhuang Qing, I think you should think about it again. Song Mei has left, why would you take such a risk again? It doesn't matter if you take risks, the key is that you take that risk
If you do, you will probably destroy yourself."
She shook her head slightly, "No, I made a promise to him. So I must do it for him."
I said: "So, what did he promise to you? How did his family treat you after he died? Have you forgotten it?"
But she said quietly: "Feng Xiao, you are not a woman, so you don't understand. We women can easily get a lot of satisfaction from a small touch, and often because of a thought that you men think is unworthy,
Everyone will pay a lot for it. Because we women are more emotional, but our women's betrayal will be more complete. Actually, I don't know why I do that, but I always can't control myself and have to do that.
"
I couldn't help but think in my heart: This Zhuang Qing, couldn't she have been brainwashed by Song Mei? Otherwise, how could it be like this? Yes, I have always been unable to understand Zhuang Qing's behavior because I have never touched it.
I have never seen a woman listen to someone so much. But Zhuang Qing's obedience can be said to be a kind of unprincipled giving.
Was she really brainwashed by Song Mei? The so-called brainwashing is someone instilling an idea in a designed way and making this idea deeply ingrained, no matter whether it is a ridiculous statement or not.
Most people should have several basic elements to be brainwashed:
First, dissatisfaction with society or surroundings. For example, dissatisfaction that may occur at any time in life. Usually this dissatisfaction may come from the accumulated resentment caused by the helplessness of changing a social phenomenon. Also, unfair social distribution is
Our society is the most likely factor to accumulate dissatisfaction. Because of this kind of resentment, it is easy to resonate with other people's common resentment. If someone with ulterior motives wants you to follow his wishes, then he only needs to provoke it now
With your resentment, you will soon lose your judgment and willpower;
Second, unrealistic dreams. If resentment is not necessarily shared by everyone, unrealistic dreams may potentially exist in everyone's heart. Unrealistic dreams lead to brainwashing, mainly manifested in several
First, people who lack social experience. Due to lack of social experience, they cannot correctly judge the theories advocated by some people and tend to think along the lines of others. For example, it is true to say that to get rich, you must pay.
What you have to pay is a question. The second is the disadvantaged group. The more disadvantaged you are, the more dreams you have. If the dream is too strong, it will evolve into an unrealistic dream. In today's society, materialistic desires are rampant and the income gap is too large.
Groups have caused great pressure for social survival. To change this situation, many people have fantasies. This kind of fantasy is too easy to be induced, because the fantasy will make you think along the lines of thinking that adapt to your fantasy;
Third, there is an aura effect similar to Qigong. For example, anyone who is caught up in an illegal pyramid scheme organization will be arranged to participate in various so-called courses. The arrangements for such courses are often carefully designed, with some giving lectures, some testifying, and others
It creates an artificial atmosphere. If a few isolated people participate in such activities and are exaggerated by the atmosphere around them, few people will have the strong determination to remain unaffected.
This is the field effect. Science has long proven that such a field also exists in interpersonal relationships, which will affect people's thoughts and ideas. This is also the reason why illegal pyramid schemes must keep participants in classes.
.
Zhuang Qing has an unprincipled and unquestioning admiration for Song Mei, so I think the possibility of her being brainwashed by Song Mei exists. Otherwise, I think all this is simply unexplainable.
However, although I doubt this, there is nothing I can do about it, because if she is really brainwashed, only psychological counseling can be used to eliminate the inherent thoughts that already exist in her mind.
.But, is she willing to go for psychological counseling?
So I tried to say to her: "Zhuang Qing, since you also think there is something wrong with your thinking, why don't you change it? For example, go to psychological counseling or something."
As I expected, she immediately became anxious with me. She immediately left my arms, turned to look at me and said: "Feng Xiao, do you think I have a psychological problem? I, Zhuang Qing, sometimes
Although I am bold in doing things, don’t I know if I am normal or not?”
I hurriedly said: "Zhuang Qing, that's not what I meant. I mean, in fact, you have realized that you don't need to pay so much for a small touch. In my opinion, such a thing is not worth it at all.
So I think you may have a psychological problem. I think you may, not necessarily. You can always talk to a psychiatrist, right? That way you can at least make a judgment about your situation, right?"
I kept shaking my head, "I have no problem. Feng Xiao, I, Zhuang Qing, am such a person. I understand, you think I have been brainwashed by Song Mei, right? That's why I keep going to avenge him. Feng Xiao
Laugh, aren’t I doing the same for your things? Have you brainwashed me too?”
I was stunned for a moment, and then I regretted the inexplicable thought I just had. I immediately hugged her and apologized to her, "I'm sorry, Zhuang Qing. Although I still think you are not worthy of going so far for my sake."
I will do it, but I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Zhuang Qing, you are so good to me, how can I repay you in the future?"
She tilted her head back and kissed my cheek, "Are you not nice to me? I feel like I should do those things for you."
I couldn't help but sigh, "Zhuang Qing, have you ever thought about it? That Mr. Dou, he...hey! Why are you doing this?"
She asked me: "Feng Xiao, what do you want to say?"
I said, "Zhuang Qing, I'm very worried now. I'm not worried about whether my things can be done, but I'm worried that Dou will always pester you in the future."
But she said: "He will definitely pester me, but doesn't this allow him to do his best to handle your affairs?"
I hurriedly said: "Zhuang Qing, look at how he tortured you last night. No, you can't continue to be tortured by him."
"I'm not afraid of a man who needs medication to function," she said.
I became even more anxious, "Can your body bear it?"
She then chuckled and said: "I can leave him at any time. It is very simple to deal with such a person, that is to constantly attack his face as a man. When the time comes, he will stop coming to me. Feng Xiao, I, Zhuang Qing, have nothing to do with you men.
I know it quite well. He took medicine last night, which shows that he cares about me and wants to enjoy my body, that's all. Since he cares about me so much, he will definitely take care of your affairs. "
I felt very uncomfortable, "Zhuang Qing, please stop thinking about me, okay?"
She immediately pinched me and said, "Are you stupid? I've already been passed over by him, can this be the end of it?"
I was silent for a moment. In fact, in my heart, I didn’t like hearing such rude language from her. After all, she is no longer the little nurse she used to be. She is still a person with a certain status. But I also
You know, she is like this because she is in front of me. In front of me, she does not need to worry about anything, so what she reveals is her true temperament.
When she saw that I was silent, she immediately reached out to touch my cheek, "Feng Xiao, let's not talk about this matter. Okay?"
I said, "No more, no more! Such a topic makes me feel very uncomfortable."
She immediately said: "Feng Xiao, do you know? I used to be like us now, Song Mei and I were wrapped in bed and watching TV. Feng Xiao, don't you think this is very comfortable and warm?"
At this moment, I seemed to suddenly understand: Maybe she had always regarded me as Song Mei's substitute.
This is probably the case, otherwise many things cannot be explained.
Of course, this can only be my guess, and it is impossible for me to ask her about it. However, no matter what, I should be grateful to her. She is so good to me and really does everything for me.
Everything about herself.
I said: "Yeah. I like it too."
She came to take my hand, and then went to her warm, soft breasts, "You touch me. His favorite thing before was that he kept touching me here when he was with me."
It seems that she really regards me as Song Mei's substitute. I was thinking to myself.
"Let me help you apply some heat." I said to her softly.
"Yeah." She said, but she still snuggled into my arms and refused to leave... (To be continued)