She seemed to understand what I meant, "Brother Feng, I noticed the small notebook inside your clothes last night. I'm sorry, I thought it was the notebook you used to record your medical records, so I took a look at it out of curiosity. Brother Feng, I know
Why did you drink last night? Hey!"
I was silent for a moment, and then said dullly after a while: "Shangguan, please go out for a moment, and by the way, please bring my shirt. I have to go to work today."
Her face turned red again, and then she immediately went to get my shirt. When she brought my shirt, it still had a hanger on it. Then she left and went to the kitchen.
I quickly put on my clothes. I still felt a little headache and my stomach was very uncomfortable, but I smelled the aroma of washing powder coming out of my shirt. I was wearing a white shirt, and I felt it on my body.
The body should be relatively straight. He looked at himself briefly, and then called in the direction of the kitchen: "Shangguan, I'm dressed."
People are like this. In fact, she took off my clothes last night, so she had already seen me naked, but it was only when I was drunk and unconscious. So people are like this.
You only feel shame when you are sober.
She came out with a smile on her face and a bowl of something in her hand. I saw steam coming out of the bowl in her hand.
"Brother Feng, why don't you have a bowl of brown sugar glutinous rice balls?" she said to me.
I looked at the time and found that it was not even eight o'clock yet. I couldn't help but be surprised by the power of my biological clock, so I nodded to her and said, "Thank you."
Then I went to sit down at the small dining table, and she had already put the bowl of glutinous rice balls on the table. I saw that the bowl was indeed filled with glutinous rice balls, small glutinous rice balls. The soup was dark red, like Chinese medicine, and there was also fermented glutinous rice.
She went to the kitchen again and came out soon with a bowl of glutinous rice balls in her hand, which was exactly the same as what I had in my bowl.
"Shangguan, I didn't expect you to cook the glutinous rice balls so quickly." I said to her with a smile, then picked up the spoon and ate a spoonful. It was not very sweet, but the taste was very good.
She smiled and said, "What? I've cooked it a long time ago. I just heated it up."
I said, "Oh, that's right. Do you eat this every morning? I never thought you were pretty good at living."
She smiled and said: "What? I usually go to the company cafeteria to have breakfast every morning. I saw you drunk like that last night, so I went to the supermarket downstairs to buy these things. Brother Feng, I am Ba
I’m here to enjoy your happiness.”
I was suddenly moved and said, "Shangguan, thank you."
She immediately became unhappy, "Brother Feng, why are you so polite? By the way, you haven't told me yet. Did you call me last night to ask me to pick you up and take you home? It shouldn't be the case, right? Before.
You've never done that."
I was so drunk last night, how could I still remember the purpose of calling her? But she was right. Even if I was drunk, I would never think of asking her to pick me up.
When I think about who to pick me up, there is only one person who is most likely to pick me up, and that is Hong Ya.
From this, I thought, maybe there was only that one thing. Yes, I must have really wanted to ask her about that thing at that time.
I still remember that before Tong Yao left, when we talked about the suicide of Liu Meng and her man, I thought that I must ask Shangguan Qin what happened to the money she gave to Liu Meng's husband.
At that time, I thought, something happened to Liu Meng and her husband. To be on the safe side, I had to remind Shangguan Qin. Otherwise, the police would easily find out the source of the money from Liu Meng, unless Shangguan Qin
He was handed cash.
So I'm thinking now that I must have started worrying about that thing again after being drunk, so that's why I made that phone call to her in that situation.
A person's thinking when drunk is incredible. Many people like to call and talk to people they think are friends most of the time. Sometimes they even keep talking until the battery of their mobile phones runs out of power. In addition,
There is another situation, that is, they will be more sensitive to things that they think are particularly important, and they can’t wait to complete it. Of course, some people may be impulsive, and they are prone to swearing, fighting, etc. But I
Generally speaking, he is a pretty steady person, so he always goes to bed after being drunk, and he has never had any fights or curses.
Therefore, I can now be very sure that the purpose of making that phone call to Shangguan was to ask her about Liu Meng's husband.
So I asked her: "Shangguan, do you know that Liu Meng and her man committed suicide together?"
She nodded, "I know. It's already been published in the newspapers."
I was slightly surprised, "So, about the money you gave him, will the police suspect that their death is related to you?"
Unexpectedly, she suddenly laughed, "Brother Feng, where did you think you were? How could it have anything to do with me? Could it be that you were doubting whether their suicide was fake? Or maybe you were doubting their suicide.
Death is murder?”
I hurriedly said: "No. How could I suspect you? But the police will probably trace you from the money, and then won't the affairs of our hospital and Liu Meng's company be exposed? Haha! I
I don’t think it matters, because I have never profited from it. But I am very worried that this matter will bring out Dean Tang and Principal Zhang. If this is really the case, then what happens next will be terrible.
"
But she suddenly asked me: "Brother Feng, tell me the truth. Liu Meng committed suicide. Aren't you sad at all?"
I was stunned for a moment, and after a while I sighed sadly: "Who said I wasn't sad? In the final analysis, I am also responsible for this matter, and it is the main responsibility. If Liu Meng and I hadn't done such a thing, her man
I would never do such a thing, and the ending would not be like this. Two lives, I am really guilty. But what can I do now? I dare not tell the police clearly about this matter.
What can I do if I explain it clearly? It will only lead to bigger and more serious consequences. Shangguan, to be honest, I feel really uncomfortable right now. I never thought that Liu Meng would actually go there.
Go that way."
What I am talking about is the truest thing in my heart. Before this, no one knew the regret and self-blame in my heart. No, it was not just pain and self-blame. I felt that I had committed a crime.
The death of Liu Meng and her man is directly related to me. I can't deny this in any way. The things are clearly there and I will never be able to forgive myself. But, what can I do now? What can I do?
I don’t dare to do it, because I just discovered now that I can no longer control myself, because now I am like a node on a network. Once my node is broken, then the entire network will be broken step by step.
The earth collapses and disintegrates, and the people around me will be implicated. Lin Yi, Lin Yu, Kang Demao, and even Chang Bailing or Governor Huang will inevitably have problems. Do you want the people here to be my friends?
, if you were kind to me, how could I do such a thing?
Therefore, I could only wrap up the guilt in my heart tightly, and also pretend in front of others that the incident had nothing to do with me. Now I seem to understand that my drunkenness last night was actually
Not only because of the notebook that Zhao Menglei left for me, but also because of Liu Meng's death. Although Zhao Menglei's incident made me blame myself and make me sad, it has become the past after all, and I
You can also find many reasons why you think you can forgive yourself. But Liu Meng's death is completely different, because it happened just a few days ago, and it was entirely because of me.
If a person is sad and feels guilty but cannot cry or even tell others about it, this is the most fatal thing. So I had no choice but to use alcohol to anesthetize myself. Moreover, my heart was already full of
With fear.
So at this moment, when Shangguan suddenly asked me this question, my inner emotions burst out violently. My voice began to choke and tears burst out, "Shangguan, you know everything about me anyway.
, I won’t hide it from you. My heart is really painful and sad, because Liu Meng, Liu Meng’s death was caused by me. I feel like I am a murderer. I am so scared, but I dare not bring this up.
Tell this thing to other people. Shangguan, I'm really scared... All of this was caused by me overindulging myself in the past. You don't know, when I learned about Liu Meng's suicide, I almost died.
I also wanted to die, but I thought of my parents, my children, and Chen Yuan who was lying on the bed now... I was so scared, not because of anything else, but because I was afraid that I would really die.
After his death, he may have implicated other people... Wuwu!"
At this point, I had already burst into tears.
She sighed, then went to get a tissue, "Here. Brother Feng, you don't need to blame yourself so much."
I took the tissue in her hand and wiped away my tears, but I couldn't stop the tears from flowing out. I shook my head and said, "Shangguan, what if I can stop blaming myself? I really hate myself now.
"Myself, I indulged myself too much in the past, which is why I have such bad consequences now. I, I really regret it now..."
"Brother Feng, listen to me." She suddenly reached out and grabbed my arm, "There is something I didn't want to tell you, but I see you blaming yourself so much and worrying that you will damage your body.
So, I’d better tell you.”
I looked at her with wide eyes, "Shangguan, could there be another reason for Liu Meng's death... her death?" (To be continued)