Don’t you want to come? Damn it, if you don’t let me come, I will come instead! I squat in front of your house every day and midnight and scold your ancestors for eighteen generations!
On the street, Lin Shuhang cursed and yelled.
"Yunlang, don't sleep at night, come with me and kick down her door!" Lin Shuhang, who was getting more and more angry as he thought about it, angrily said to Zuo Yunlang.
Zuo Yunlang, who was also aggrieved, said angrily: "Okay! From now on, we will kick her door down every day and in the middle of the night!"
"Then after kicking the door, do you want to pee on her door?" Zuo Yunlang asked.
Lin Shuhang said: "How can peeing relieve the hatred in my heart? From now on, I will defecate in front of her house every day and midnight!"
"Drinking two kilograms of water when she poops will cause her to have diarrhea and make her sick to death! Only in this way can we wash away our shame!"
The two teenagers started talking to each other one by one. After a cup of tea, they both became a little bored, so they squatted on the street and watched the passers-by and started to comment.
"Oh, man, look, that girl has a nice figure!" Lin Shuhang said excitedly, pointing to a passing girl.
Lin Shuhang said fascinatedly: "The breasts are big enough, and the butt is big enough! But the old face is not that good, it looks like an uncle's face, it is full of folds, and they are pressed together."
Zuo Yunlang glanced at him and said disdainfully: "Then you are still staring at me lustfully? My husband is too embarrassed not to stare at you."
After looking left and right for a while, Zuo Yunlang suddenly pointed at a pedestrian and shouted.
"Brother Fang, look, isn't that the shopkeeper of the Junzi Inn? Look at that man, he carries an abacus everywhere he goes! It's really strange."
Lin Shuhang looked in the direction of Zuo Yunlang's finger, and sure enough he saw the shopkeeper of the Junzi Inn.
The shopkeeper was walking this way alone, and suddenly he seemed to have thought of something. He took out the abacus from his back and stood on the street and started fiddling with it.
"No way? How many accounts does this gentleman's innkeeper have yet to finish? He doesn't forget his abacus while walking. It's really interesting."
The two of them squatted on the ground and watched curiously. They expected the man to leave soon, but unexpectedly after watching for a long time, the shopkeeper of the Gentleman Inn was still standing on the street fiddling with his abacus.
Pedestrians passing by looked at it strangely, and the shopkeeper didn't notice either, acting as if it was none of my business to go your own way.
I have to say that the shopkeeper of the Junzi Inn was really hot-tempered. He actually stood on the street doing calculations all morning! In the end, Lin Shuhang couldn't stand it any longer and stood up with a roar.
"What kind of account is this! It's so difficult to calculate. I've been doing it all morning and haven't finished it yet. It's a waste of my expression. I'll go take a look!" Lin Shuhang said and walked towards the shopkeeper.
"Hey! Shopkeeper? What kind of calculations are you doing? You've been doing it all morning and you haven't settled it yet! Is it still alive?" Lin Shuhang stood beside the man and asked with his head stretched out.
The shopkeeper of the Junzi Inn glanced sideways at Lin Shuhang and continued to make calculations.
"It's none of your business if I settle my accounts," the shopkeeper said without raising his head.
Lin Shuhang thought to himself, haha, why is it none of my business? This thing is like watching a news broadcast. If you don’t watch it, you won’t be able to die!
Thinking of the news network, Lin Shuhang felt like he wanted to cry. Many people never saw the finale of the news network from birth to death. At least Lin Shuhang grew up watching the news network. Lin Shuhang thought, if you are like the news
How can I survive if I stand here like a hookup and don't listen?
After a while, the other party asked curiously: "Little brother, how did you know that I calculated the accounts all morning?"
Lin Shuhang said angrily: "Don't you know? I've been squatting on the street watching you all morning! I am very curious, so it's okay if I don't look at some things. If I look at them, I will see them all. If I don't see them, I
It’s uncomfortable. You said it doesn’t matter where you go, but you stand on the street!”
The shopkeeper smiled, said nothing, and continued to make calculations.
"Brother, what is his calculation?" Zuo Yunlang limped over at this time, grabbing a branch.
Stretching his head and taking a look, Zuo Yunlang immediately exclaimed in surprise: "Hey, isn't this arithmetic?"
The shopkeeper was shocked when he heard this and immediately put his plan aside.
The other party stared at Zuo Yunlang and said warily: "Little brother, how do you know this is arithmetic?"
Zuo Yunlang said: "My father knew some arithmetic when he was still alive, so my son will naturally know a thing or two about it."
"What's your father's name?" the shopkeeper asked with a frown.
"Zuo Yujiang."
The other party was shocked and asked urgently: "Are they from the Nine Netherworlds of the Central Plains?"
Zuo Yunlang nodded and said, "How did you know that your late father was from the Central Plains?"
The shopkeeper smiled and said: "Who knows about the Divine Fortune Teller in the Central Plains? Who doesn't know about the Divine Fortune Teller in the Central Plains? Our Northwest Tianji Sect has been closely related to the Divine Fortune Teller in the Central Plains since the founding of the sect. Naturally, we know your father's reputation." [Tianji Sect, Tianji Sect,
The Northern Arithmetic Sect, Shenji Sect, and the Central Plains Arithmetic Sect.]
Zuo Yunlang asked in surprise: "Dare you ask your name, sir?"
The other party smiled and said: "The golden abacus means impermanence."
Zuo Yunlang exclaimed: "It turns out to be Uncle Chang, the fortune teller! This uncle and nephew are so polite!"
Zuo Yunlang hurriedly bowed to Tiansuanzi Dao Wuchang, and then said respectfully: "Many years ago, my father often mentioned your reputation as Uncle Chang to Fan'er. My father said that Uncle Chang was his best friend in life and death, and we used to travel together.
Traveling to the ends of the earth, I have left many strange and secret stories in these rivers and lakes. I never thought that I would be lucky enough to meet Fan'er by chance in this northern country."
Tiansuanzi Dao Wuchang waved his hand and said: "I have retired from the world for many years. Moti was brave back then!"
Lin Shuhang on the side was confused, so he interrupted and said, "What are you talking about? You are both a divine fortune teller and a heavenly fortune teller. What else is arithmetic?"
The two ignored Lin Shuhang and continued to talk emotionally, but the witch ghost attached to Lin Shuhang gave an explanation.
It turns out that arithmetic, also known as divination, is a kind of divination similar to divination. Both can peek into the sky and know the secrets of heaven and earth, but divination relies on divination, while arithmetic relies on calculation!
In the vast world, there are countless magic and secret arts. As a kind of magic that can peek into the sky and steal secrets, arithmetic has been regarded as the number one secret skill in the world since ancient times.
Although it is regarded as the best secret art in the world, few people practice arithmetic, because it is a kind of fortune-telling that goes against the will of heaven. In modern terms, it is just a trick, and sooner or later it will have to be repaid.
As the saying goes, the secrets of heaven must not be leaked, and those who spy on the sky often do not end well, because the way of heaven is the greatest in the world, and everything is born and dies in heaven. Anyone who peeks into the sky is violating the way of heaven and is an act against heaven. Zuo Yujiang, the father of Zuo Yunlang,
It was because he peeked into heaven that he suffered misfortune.
Lin Shuhang suddenly realized and said: "It turns out that shopkeeper Chang is a fortune teller! No wonder he keeps calculating with an abacus every day."
"So, Shopkeeper Chang, can you help me calculate when my virginity will break?" Lin Shuhang asked excitedly.
Tiansuanzi Dao Wuchang glanced at Lin Shuhang, as if he was looking at a fool.
“You can figure out when I’ll get married!”
"Brother, fortune tellers cannot use arithmetic casually, or they will be punished by God." Zuo Yunlang carefully reminded Lin Shuhang, who was clinging to him.
"Oh, forget it, I'll just believe in the horoscope! The zodiac says that I will enjoy physical pleasure at the beginning of the year, and the Chinese New Year will be in half a month. I don't know if it's true or not. I'm really looking forward to it!"
The two of them rolled their eyes at Lin Shuhang and shook their heads helplessly. Hey, this kid!
Looking at the sky, it was already noon. That day, the operator Dao Wuchang said to Zuo Yunlang: "Fan'er, it's not a good time to talk here. You should follow me to the inn to chat."
"Yes." Zuo Yunlang nodded, and together with Lin Shuhang, he followed Tian Suanzi Dao Wuchang and walked towards the Junzi Inn.
Zezhou is very lively at the end of the year. Many city residents take advantage of this time to sell New Year's goods on the streets. From fireworks and firecrackers to dried fruits and Spring Festival couplets, Zezhou has all the necessary New Year's goods for the Spring Festival.
The festival is approaching, and the Junzi Inn has also ushered in the busiest period of the year. Many pedestrians buying New Year's goods flocked into the inn at meal time, so that the eight clerks in the store were extremely busy.
Although the Junzi Inn store is not large, it is the most famous one in Zezhou.
It is said that more than a hundred years ago, when Zezhou was first built as a city, this inn was established here. At that time, a down-and-out scholar who was unsuccessful in his official career passed by this place and saw the barbarity in the mines, so he built a cloth shed here.
He sold some tea to some miners who were mining. Unexpectedly, over time, the scholar also accumulated some money.
Later, the land was converted to build a city, so the scholar demolished the cloth shed and built two tile-roofed houses in the city with his savings. After several years of hard work, the scholar built a building on the original address.
The tallest and largest restaurant! And it was officially named "Junzi Inn"!
In the future, as more and more miners came to Zezhou from all directions to mine, the business of the scholar's inn became better and better.
Places with people are more competitive. With the rapid increase in Zezhou's population, all kinds of jealous businessmen have come here one after another. After a hundred years of ups and downs, countless inns have opened their doors for business with confidence, and countless inns have closed silently.
, but this gentleman's inn has been prospering and making money for many years.
Some people say that the reason why this inn has survived for a hundred years is because of the strong connections behind it. Not only the soldiers guarding the city and officials from the county government often came to eat and drink, but even some people from the underworld often came to patronize it.
In fact, those who don’t know are wrong. The reason why this inn is what it is today is entirely due to one store rule!
"Do what a gentleman does and behave like a gentleman!" This was the store rule established by the scholar when he started his business. However, just such a store rule that ordinary businessmen scorned has caused an inconspicuous inn to go through hundreds of years of vicissitudes!
The down-and-out scholar a hundred years ago adhered to the royal principles of the service industry, so the Junzi Inn, which has been passed down for three generations, naturally has a considerable number of patrons!
It is inevitable for a businessman to offend some envious colleagues. This is also the case with this time-honored inn. For hundreds of years, people have been plotting against them, ranging from gangsters smashing them up with sticks to being poisoned by traitors. The three generations of innkeepers often cannot bear the suffering, but because
The connections and forces behind the inn managed to survive.
"If you don't dominate in the day and don't steal in the night, you are a gentleman. A gentleman is magnanimous and has the breeze on his sleeves!"
"Don't bully the old, don't humiliate the weak, you are a gentleman. A gentleman is noble and upright!"
"Children do not deceive, it is the style of a gentleman!"
Every time I see this gentleman's couplet, the guests who come here to dine and stay overnight feel a sense of peace of mind. Isn't it peace of mind that guests can enjoy after dining and staying overnight? Therefore, whenever the business of this gentleman's inn makes other inns jealous,
.
At noon this day, the Junzi Inn was full again. The waiter’s shouts and the guests’ punches filled the entire inn. The messy environment was annoying, but this was not an elegant and quiet place, so no one paid attention to it.
Those who should eat should eat, and those who should drink should drink. Those who want to be quiet will go directly to the teahouse opposite. This is just a place for eating, drinking and boxing.
Zuo Yunlang, who was good at arithmetic, stood in front of the counter and became shopkeeper Chang's apprentice, collecting money and calculating accounts. He was very busy with his abacus clicking. Lin Shuhang helped as a waiter.
, running around with plates in hand, I was so tired that I was miserable.
Some guests at the inn come and leave quickly, but another wave of guests patted their butts and left after finishing their meal.
As soon as this wave of guests left, another wave of guests entered the inn.
The few people who came in were miners who were all dirty. As soon as they entered the store, they went straight to the empty seats to do the work.
"Little Er! Little Er!" the miners who were eating shouted at the top of their lungs.
"Hey! Hey! It's coming, it's coming!" Lin Shuhang immediately ran over with a playful smile.
"What do you gentlemen want to eat?"
As he spoke, Lin Shuhang took off the rag from his shoulder and wiped the table. After the last batch of guests left, the table was in a mess, with drinks and leftovers sprinkled all over it. The smell of vomit made Lin Shuhang couldn't help but wrinkle.
brow.
"Five big bowls of noodles! Put more meat in it!" said a miner.
Lin Shuhang smiled and said, "Would you like some food?"
"Yes!" the man responded rudely.
“Let’s order some steamed buns by the way!”
"Sir, this is the menu, take a look." Lin Shuhang said and handed over the menu pinned to his waist.
"What menu do you want? Give us a whole plate of pickles." The other party dialed back the menu.
"Pickles?" Lin Shuhang's face turned dark immediately. Damn it, are you going to ruin the place? All these things, brother, you must know that this is a restaurant, not a street stall!
Lin Shuhang laughed and said, "I'm sorry, our store doesn't sell steamed buns, and we don't have pickles either."
A group of miners immediately slapped the table and shouted: "What kind of inn is this! Why are we not allowed to eat anything? Eat shit!"
"If you don't want to eat, leave quickly. There are still customers queuing up! If you want to eat steamed buns, go to the steamed bun shop to buy them. They are not available here!" Lin Shuhang is angry. He doesn't have much money but he has a bad temper. Damn it!
A group of miners immediately became unwilling and pulled Lin Shuhang and shouted: "Is there any business like this? Return to the Gentleman Inn, I think it is more like a bandit inn!"
"You are so stupid! I just have this temper. If you don't want to eat, leave quickly. Don't drag me by my clothes or drag me to get angry with you again!"
Hearing the noise here, the shopkeeper frowned and walked over quickly.
"I'm sorry to you gentlemen. This guy just came today. Some of him can't speak. He's a kid and has such a temper. Please forgive me!" Shopkeeper Daowuchang said to the miners with a condescending expression.
Sample.
Lin Shuhang couldn't stand it anymore. Shopkeeper Chang is too spineless, isn't he? Isn't it too soft for you to humbly apologize to others when they cause trouble in your territory?
"Fuzi, hurry up and serve these guests five large bowls of noodles, a plate of pickles and some steamed buns." Shopkeeper Chang turned around and called to a waiter.
The waiter named Fuzi shouted: "Shopkeeper, we don't have any steamed buns here."
Shopkeeper Chang turned around and said angrily: "If there are no steamed buns, why don't you let the kitchen steam them? Go to the kitchen and let the chefs steam them."
"Okay!" The waiter named Fuzi responded, turned around and ran into the back room.
Hey, look at this waiter, he smiles like a flower when he hears the steamed buns are being steamed. Is he so happy? Lin Shuhang thought gloomily. Little did he know that this is the professional smile of waiters, and he can't say whether he is happy or not.
Shopkeeper Chang said with a sneer: "Guys, calm down, I'll give you some free side dishes later as compensation."
What the hell? Are you giving away a few side dishes for free? Lin Shuhang’s eyes widened, Uncle Chang! As for this? Are these people really here to cause trouble? Then there’s no need to be so afraid of them. Aren’t you very strict about your background and relationships?
Are you going to fight them? Are you afraid that you can’t fight them?
Seeing that the shopkeeper had said this, several guests were too embarrassed to say anything else and sat down one after another.
"The shopkeeper is good at talking, and he listens! It's not like this little guy who gets angry before he even says a few words, as if he's choking on shit."
As soon as he heard this, Lin Shuhang jumped up and pointed at everyone and yelled: "You act like you are choking on shit! Your whole family is choking on shit!"
The shopkeeper hurriedly grabbed Lin Shuhang and said to everyone: "Don't worry, young people are just like rocks that have fallen from the mountain. They always have some edges and corners when they hit the ground. They need to be given some time to sharpen and sharpen them before they become round. I think of mine when I was young.
He also has a bad temper. Haha, just wait here for a moment, what you want will be here in a minute."
"Lin Shuhang, come with me." Shopkeeper Chang signaled to Lin Shuhang and said.
Lin Shuhang followed him unconvinced.
The two of them came to the counter and stood still.
Before the other party could speak, Lin Shuhang said: "Shopkeeper Chang, don't blame me for this! You occupy such a big table and only order some steamed buns, pickles and the like. Don't you think this is just to cause trouble?"
Shopkeeper Chang sighed and shook his head: "Young man, you are still young. Businessmen pay attention to being friendly and making money. If you talk to people in a friendly manner, how can they make noises with you?"
Lin Shuhang said angrily: "People scold me for choking on shit, and I still humble myself. Isn't this aggrieved?"
Dao Wuchang shook his head and said: "Businessmen are just like the coquettish women in the spring courtyard. What they sell is not things, but smiles. Smiles and kindness are the rules of the game in this industry, and they have nothing to do with dignity."
"Every business is a competitive game, and every competitive game has an underlying rule. The rule of doing business is that you can't have a temper, or you can't lose your temper with your customers. Look at me, I look like a waiter.
Are you like this?"
Lin Shuhang said: "I don't want to do business, so why can't I have a temper."
Dao Wuchang patted Lin Shuhang on the shoulder and said: "Young man, of course you can have a temper. After you take off these clothes after leaving the inn, you can be crazy, you can be arrogant, you can take off your pants and roll around in the street, but in my case
In the Gentleman's Inn, you are a waiter, not an uncle."
"I know I'm not an uncle, but I'm not a grandson either!" Lin Shuhang pouted in dissatisfaction.
Shopkeeper Chang said earnestly: "Young men should learn to think from other people's perspective. If you go to an inn for a meal and stay overnight, how would you feel if the waiter from another place slaps the table and stares at you?"
"Don't ignore these customers. You must know that if he can bring four friends this time, he can bring ten next time! This time he ordered noodles and steamed buns, maybe he will order delicacies next time. You know why Junzi Inn is so popular
Is it so good? It’s because we value every guest.”
Lin Shuhang shrugged and remained silent. Even the fortune teller of his Tianji Sect could nod and bow to a group of dirty and poor miners. What can he say about such a good temper? Hey, do you think it is easy to be a waiter in a shop selling jokes?
!
It was only later that Lin Shuhang had to sincerely admire Dao Wuchang. Shopkeeper Chang was right. The miner actually brought ten friends with him, and the food he ate was changed from steamed buns and pickles to enviable delicacies from the mountains and seas.
It seems that selling a smile can really sell a university degree.