Maybe she really just regards me as a friend, or maybe she can completely suppress her inner feelings deep in her heart. Maybe this is what makes her unique, and it is also the reason why she can be so successful in this industry.
Reasons for success.
I answered her: "You don't know her. Qu Jin knows her. She graduated from the Conservatory of Music."
She said: "I know, Qu Jin told me. She is very beautiful, right?"
A warm feeling suddenly arose in my heart, and at the same time I was a little embarrassed, "It's not important to be pretty, but her eyes look very much like Zhao Menglei."
She was silent for a moment, and then said: "I understand. You told me before that Zhao Menglei was a female classmate you liked in middle school. It seems that you still can't forget the feeling of your first love. Feng Xiao, I
I still remember what you told me before, saying that each of us has been searching for the half of ourselves throughout our lives, and now it seems that you have truly found your half, right?"
I said: "That should be the case. I also hope that is the case."
She sighed, "Now that I think about it, I was very sorry for Zhao Menglei before. We were both ridiculous at that time. Feng Xiao, have you really decided to fall in love with your current girlfriend?"
I noticed that she did not mention Chen Yuan in front of me. In other words, the only person who really felt guilty in her heart was Zhao Menglei, not Chen Yuan. Maybe it was because Chen Yuan was Lin Yi's daughter.
Zhuang Qing has always had an inexplicable hatred for Lin Yi, which is hard for me to understand until now. But it is impossible for me to tell her such things under the current circumstances. I said: "Yes, I
The purpose of calling you today is also for this matter."
She said: "Congratulations. Feng Xiao, I have been in a free period recently, so I am relatively free. Do you think this will work? Let's go somewhere for two days. This can be regarded as the relationship between the two of us over the years.
Closure and remembrance.”
Her words made me excited, and I almost agreed immediately, but my reason told me that I couldn't do this. After hesitating for a moment, I said to her: "Zhuang Qing, I can't do that anymore. First, I really don't have time recently.
, because I will go to work in a new place soon. Secondly, I feel that I can no longer be the same as before. That would not only be irresponsible to myself, but also irresponsible to my current girlfriend. Zhuang Qing,
I have been through so much and cannot make the same mistakes again."
She immediately laughed, "Feng Xiao, I just tested you. It seems that you are really sincere to your current girlfriend. Well, I won't say anything anymore. Feng Xiao, listen today
I'm very happy after hearing this news from you and wish you happiness. By the way, you just said you were going to work somewhere else soon, what? You were promoted again? "
Her words made me suddenly realize, and at the same time, I felt extremely ashamed. I hurriedly told her that I was going to work in Dongjiang City. Finally, I said: "It's not a promotion, it's to go to such a poor and backward place. I will definitely do it in the future."
I’m even busier. I can’t help it.”
She said: "Being busy is a good thing, it will make your life more fulfilling."
Afterwards, we chatted for a few more words before hanging up the phone. When we ended the call, I couldn't help but let out a long sigh of relief. At the same time, I felt an inexplicable emptiness in my heart. I
You know, this is the inner feeling of loss that I felt after I completely severed the relationship with Zhuang Qing. After all, we have been together for so long, and there have been so many good things between us.
A man who has been free for so long will suddenly be bound by true feelings. I am really not used to it. But I think it is all worth it, because true love is hard to find.
Now, the only thing I face is the last and biggest problem, which is to face Lin Yu. I have already thought about it, and I will go to Lin Yu to have a good talk this weekend, because I have to go
Face this matter, otherwise Chenchen and I will not be able to last long, and the mistakes of the past will be made again.
Now that I look back and analyze the deaths of Zhao Menglei and Chen Yuan, I always feel that I am responsible. Just imagine, if it wasn't for my betrayal of Zhao Menglei, would she have chosen to commit suicide? If I hadn't been with Chen Yuan,
If Chen Yuan is still as bohemian after getting married, will Chen Yuan remain in a coma? Perhaps her coma is a kind of self-escape, because she hopes to live in her dream forever, because she does not want to face me when she wakes up.
The reality of being unfaithful to her.
Many times I have to admit that the deaths of Zhao Menglei and Chen Yuan are the biggest pain in my heart. I think the two people I feel most sorry for in my life are them. There are also Liu Meng and Shangguan Qin. Their deaths are all related to
I have a great relationship.
If I continue to be single, I may come into contact with more and more women in the future, and the number of people who will be harmed will also increase. Isn't this the case with Ruan Jie today?
Therefore, I can no longer let Chenchen get hurt, and at the same time, I very much hope to restrain myself from now on, live a peaceful life, and do my own thing well in a down-to-earth manner.
Just now, I finally withstood Zhuang Qing's temptation to me, and I became more confident in myself. But at this time, I couldn't help but think in my heart: If I had promised Zhuang Qing just now, she would really be with me.
Going out together?
But I know in my heart that it is meaningless to imagine such things now. The phone call with Zhuang Qing just now made me more confident, and I believe that I can change all my past lifestyles.
The next day, I received an unexpected call. Actually, I can’t say it was completely unexpected, because the call was from Qu Jin.
Her first sentence was to ask me directly: "Brother Feng, I heard Zhuang Qing said that you are already in love with Chenchen?"
I don't know why Zhuang Qing told Qu Jin so quickly. Maybe it's because the two of them are very good friends?
I answered: "Yes. Qu Jin, are you and Tanaka okay?"
She said: "No. Now I understand that his life was so chaotic before. I hesitated a little."
I suddenly felt an inexplicable uneasiness in my heart: I encouraged Tian Zhong to tell Qu Jin everything about him, and I did have bad intentions at that time. Now, when I hear Qu Jin tell me this
At that time, I suddenly felt a little ashamed of Tanaka. Although Tanaka is relatively chaotic and bold on the issue of male-female relations, he is a Japanese after all, and some things are part of their culture. In addition, from all aspects,
So far as he's concerned, he's pretty good.
Moreover, as far as I am concerned, my past is not much better than Tanaka’s, it’s just that I did some things more secretly. (To be continued)